Cravings of Human Nature
A Poem
I like being alone,
With this solitude that I’ve been
Conditioned with.
I enjoy the sound of trees outside
my window,
and I find pleasure in
the roaring seas
just down the road from my home.
Where plants run wild,
as birds chirp in their trees of
songs that nature
finds euphoric.
But at night,
when the birds rest their heads
in their nests,
and the seas are distant,
and the sound of leaves morph into
those dark thoughts
clouding my head.
I find myself longing for something,
a someone.
You see, the ocean can only bring me
so much joy and attention.
But I can’t bring it home,
and hold it at night
after a bad dream.
No matter how much birdseed I throw
outside in the garden,
those birds always fly and
find a new home.
Those leaves, they talk
but only to each other.
They don’t converse back
and they don’t comfort me when
my mind gets the better of me.
I open my phone and see happy lovers,
best friends,
mothers and daughters,
fathers and daughters,
with loving and healthy relationships.
I look back into the mirror and all I feel
is this form of self-hatred.
I try to control it,
I try to tame it.
But like the sea, it’s untameable and
violent.
I walk these halls in my home,
wondering why I’m so alone.
No matter how many books I read,
how many poems I write,
how many songs do I listen to,
the void inside me is empty
and running low on
whatever fuel is needed to
survive.
I crave a love that is tender and sweet,
I crave a friendship that is fulfilling
and adventurous,
I crave a family that cares and
doesn’t make me feel small
when I hold my phone to my ear,
on a Sunday night.
I crave affection,
I crave passion and drive.
I crave hour-long calls,
our bodies tangled in sheets,
followed by late and lazy breakfasts
the next morning.
But for now,
my cravings run me down.
